Frühlingsgefühle

The winter’s been long, and hectic; to be completely fair, I don’t know when the springtime started off this year. In a good way the restless times were filled with amazing happenings. I’ve travelled to both very distant and nearby places, I’ve been enjoying my work like never before, I’ve gradually gained more recognition externally and I’ve engaged in interesting initiatives in Berlin community for women in electronic music and tech. I also feel that I’ve never loved the city more than I do now. Although on the surface my relationship with the city rather seem like the ‘it’s complicated’ status.

Not everything’s been awesome lately. I’ve been through some health issues and it showed me the physical limits (not yet memento mori but at least giving some headspace for thinking about myself). While I’m still recovering, I’ve made the most important decision of not exceeding these limits anytime soon. I almost burned out on the job, networks and friendships, but I was lucky enough to spot the symptoms early enough and seek out for support.

I replaced the impossible agenda (even though my life is still pretty much fully planned until July 2017) with blank spots for actually being spontaneous, a space for the sheer laughter and going with the flow, like I used to in my post-Poznań and pre-Berlin life. Even that Germany is not a country for spontaneous people and not making plans leads straightforward to solitude, I prioritise it over forcing myself through 17th event on the 7th day of the week.

I still plan carefully my travels and dream about the upcoming destinations, but will plan to spend the summer in the city, sitting by the river bank, enjoying the long days and warm nights with whatever floats my boat.

Only last week beautiful things happened because of that: on Monday I booked a helicopter trip for 20 EUR for my upcoming holidays on Faroe Islands, on Tuesday I took a long walk with a friend in the sun, on Wednesday I decided to skip the meet up in Factory just to cycle and eat out with my bestie, on Thursday I enjoyed the sunset at Alt-Stralau while wearing a Brazilian bikini, on Friday I left work at 6 pm with saying that my weekend will be ‘low key’. Only to receive a call from a good old friend of mine who happened to be in Berlin. Yesterday I spent time with friends and strangers who became friends, and today I’m indulging myself in the sounds and solitude.

I’m so much looking forward to the changes and new ways of life to discover ahead of me. I’ve lately read about the DRD4-7 gene responsible e.g. for the personality trait of novelty seeking and I already know that I’m a proud owner of it. I’m predisposed to be an eternal nomad, with little tolerance to stability and boredom, and reduced ability to focus on one thing at a time. I have the feeling there’s more people with this particular trait in Berlin than in any other city I’ve lived in the past. But in order to enjoy this fantastic place to the fullest, it is crucial to recover and manage the energy.

And I have the feeling that spring/summer days are the best to do so. I’d like to thank my friend who captured the featured image of my neighbourhood on Friday evening, for reminding me about yet one more reason to love this city.

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